Earlier this year, Disney Animation took us into the world of ZOOTOPIA, a fantastical world of anthropomorphized animals who live in a world that looks just like ours… but isn’t. Judy Hopps marveled at the sights of the metropolis on her iconic monorail ride into town where she saw the sights of various areas including Tundratown, Savanna Central, and of course the fabulous Sahara Square which at its center featured a dazzling gigantic palm tree building that we can only assume was the most dazzlingly spectacular premiere casino for the town. And if Zootopia had a Palmtree Casino Resort, it would only be fitting that top musical acts like Gazelle would be booked there.
We can see the press release for it now…
In a multi-million dollar deal announced today by Zootopia casino magnate Mr. Big, the number one entertainer in the animal kingdom, Gazelle, will be making the Palmtree Casino Resort her exclusive home for the next three years. The new show, to be helmed by visionary former Cirque du Slotheil director Jacques Leifeiter, will require a six month renovation of the Palmtree Theatre to accommodate its massive sets. Gazelle will be joined onstage by a cast including her signature dancing tigers, as well as over 60 other acrobatic and dancing mammals.
Mr. Big addressed the gathered press with Gazelle at his side. “It’s no secret that top online casino websites have hurt our business, but there’s no substitute for live entertainment. We’re confident that Palmtree Casino Resort will pull in thousands of new guests to see Gazelle’s spectacular show, who will then visit our casino where they can play black jack, roulette, slots, poker, whatever their hearts desire. Our games can accommodate mammals of all shapes and sizes, and our new giraffes-only gambling lounge makes that dream a reality.”
In an effort to boost his flagging casino, each ticket will come with a voucher for 20 free gaming chips for use in the Palmtree Casino after the show. Will bringing in Gazelle turn the losing spiral into a winning streak?
For her part, Gazelle seemed genuinely excited to have a resident gig. “Touring can be exhausting. Partnering with the Palmtree Casino allows me to be close to the causes that need my attention here in Zootopia.”
The show’s director, famed sloth Jacque Leifeiter, was asked for comment but due to time constraints, we were not able to hear his entire sentence. “I…am….thrilled…to…direct…” was as far as we got before the lights were being turned out and security asked us to leave.
Tickets for Gazelle’s record-breaking run will go on sale in two months, with MastodonCard holders getting first crack at pre-sale seats.
We’re ready to book our flights NOW!
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